call•me•jonah

At the semi-mature age of 22 Jonah purchased his first pair of woman's jeans. He is a size 6. Many girls around the world would envy him for that. He brought his female friend the rogue typographer with him, hoping that people would think that he was shopping with her. Once at Old Navy, however, he soon realized that he cared much less about what people would think than he had feared. He found the perfect pair on the sales table. Skinny ultra-low-rise black jeans perfect for hip girls, emo boys, and Jonah.
Now before you begin to judge Jonah for shopping on the wrong side of the aisle or for copying cryface emo trendies. Consider that it's not his fault that he was born with toothpicks in the place of legs. Nor is it his fault that men's jeans (except perhaps those sold at exorbitant prices at express mens) are tailored for lumber jack legs. Jonah prefers to harken back to predecessors like Andy Warhol, Ewan Mcgregor in Trainspotting, old westerns, and Zak Kyes (who have all been known to sport skin tight black jeans). Screw those emo kids.
He believes he has felt a warm reception into the art world since donning the black skintights. He believes they were integral to his 30 minute conversation with the violinist from The Album Leaf, and to Brian from Art Prostitute actually looking him in the eye when he shook his hand. Perhaps they even had a place in shy Shannon sitting beside him on the couch and talking about cars at the Red Bull art of the can exhibition. He, however, refuses to attribute his recent addiction to Mario Kart Double Dash to his new leggings, siting that his addiction occured slightly before he had acquired said leggings.